November 20, 2002

Fellowship, anyone?

We knelt in a circle, each fingering a friend's prayer-request card. One by one, we prayed for the items listed. Then came Janet's turn to pray.

"Father, I thank you that we're not supposed to know about each other's burdens. I thank you that we're not supposed to pray for each other's struggles. We're just supposed to encourage each other by smiling as when we pass on the sidewalk."

My soul screamed.

"Father, we are
so far from Thee!
Is this truly
what You have
called us to do?"

I could barely contain my sobs as each girl picked up the theme, ignored the prayer-requests, and prayed for light-hearted smiles, good times, and impersonal feats of encouragement.

After the prayer meeting, Janet stopped me. "I need to speak to you in private." I obliged her. "Listen," she was shaking with anger, "I don't ever want to do that here again. It's wrong to pray about things like that. It makes me uncomfortable and it makes everyone else uncomfortable. Nobody should pray for things like that."

Things like that. Hmm. What were we praying for? Someone's battle with greed? Another's struggle with lust? No.

We were praying for spiritual growth. Praying that we would know our God. Praying that we would find great spoil in His word.

I was dumbfounded. How could anyone say such a thing? Pray such a thing? Didn't "bear one another's burdens" come screaming out at her in the midst of such a prayer?

I piously spent much time examining the Word. Seeking wisdom for "solving" this problem. Seeking...something with which to refute Janet's philosophy. But, to my consternation, the light of God's perfect Word wouldn't shine into my neighbor's heart. Wouldn't reveal something with which to convict Janet of her sin. What was wrong with the Book? Wasn't it supposed to purify?

The mirror
reflects only
the person
looking into it.
Only reveals
the emptiness
of the face
standing before
it's illumination.
Only exposes the
barrenness
of my own life.
Not the folly
of another's.

Oh, in philosophy, I'd tell you any day that we're supposed to be bearing each other's burdens. That we need to quit playing games, quit wearing masks, quit hemming and hawing about the truth of God's word. But all such philosophy is vain conceit. Empty mockery of truth.

If we live by the Spirit, let us also WALK by the Spirit. How do I walk? How do we walk? Sadly, we must admit that we coast through our days with glib, hi-how-are-you-I'm-fine-thanks-have-a-good-day "encouragement" for our brothers and sisters in Christ. Fellowship? Well, the latest movie was good. Except, of course, for that one part. Classes are going well. Oh, and yeah, before-I-forget-my-God-was-good-because-He-gave-me-an-A-on-the-test. Every once in a while we get a glimpse of how fellowship should be. An intense time of prayer with someone who is hurting. A sleepless night praying for someone's salvation. But those aren't the norm. Why? Is it the pain? The sacrifice? The...pride?

Is it any wonder that such a shallow culture eventually reveals itself in honest prayer? Contrary to my typical blogs, I don't want to present any answers or wave any quick fixes before your eyes. I've done that long enough.

I want to know
what you think.
Want to know what
the Lord is doing
in your soul.
Want to know
the real person
behind that mask.
Want to bear
your burdens
and so,
fulfill the law of Christ.

Posted by stephanie at November 20, 2002 09:32 PM